there is no excuse for

Being green before 4pm
None
Unless you have some serious hormones going on and even the clinical strength deodorant can’t save you
There’s just no reason
What, yu jus never bother bathe?
Or maybe you did the sniff test on the clothes and overestimated the number of usable hours it had left?
Or forgot your deodorant…but if you spoil so quickly there may be an issue, and you in particular should have deodorant in your bag
Or maybe you went hiking, just threw the stuff you were wearing into the machine on delicate thereby effectively re distributing the sweat versus removing it and now your salty little friend has come back for revenge

But all of these things can be avoided using a few simple steps
1)Wash your clothes thoroughly, pay special attention to the ones that have been through hard use and don’t be afraid to get a little baking soda and dettol in the mix <—-them have some nice one weh smell like all lavender now

2)STOP doing the sniff test and wear clean clothes! you are a grown ass person now. I'll allow it for casual outings, but you cannot take those types of risks in a work situation.
(I realise this may be near impossible to do, so the low-fat alternative of this is to adjust the dirt-o-meter in your nose. You have to begin to move things into the 'need to wash' pile sooner than you previously would have. Yes, even the jeans)

3)Bathe (and if necessary wash your hair) before leaving the house. Even a pan bath where you only tidy and wash possible

4)Brush your teeth before you leave the house <— iSTAN for oral hygiene

5)Put on deodorant before you leave the house. (If you have a tendency to ripen during the course of the day see a doctor or get a stronger deodorant)

If you follow these steps I can guarantee you will have even one more friend than before and people won't avoid hugging you like the plague. Also, the world will seem a much more pleasant place as you make the delightful discovery that people don't just walk around with their faces wrinkled up on a daily basis, no, the skin up face is them trying to get their nose closer to their top lip in an effort to block out the smell!
So look at that….environmentally friendly smells and smiles all around

Damn I love it when everybody wins
*sniffes towel downy ad style*

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s