how to know if you’re sprung

(if you’re on my facebook you may remember this from a couple year’s back but i had to re-share because these things is still relevant. once people get hit with the love stone it’s madness! some of them are new)

Originally posted October 24, 2008

1. You get so tired of watching the phone for a text or call, that you put the phone down and walk away from it on purpose hoping when you go back you’ll find either

2. Men: You know her preferred tampon or pad
Women: you know his preferred condom

3. You find yourself washing underwear

4. you accompany them to “girls night out” or “boys night out”

5. Your friends say things like: we want to go out next month, better ask permission from now

6. you actually go and ask for permission

7. your friends stop inviting you to girl’s night out/boys night out, and instead tag empty spaces in picture with your name

8. you find yourself using the phrase: if you ever leave me, will you take me with you?

9. you keep pieces of his/her unwashed clothes around for rainy days and long trips

10. he/she knows all your passwords and pins or worse you have a SHARED e-mail account

11. You spend more time checking his/her facebook/myspace/hi-5 updates than actually updating your page

12. Your facebook page doesn’t just say ‘in a relationship” it says “in a relationship with (insert name her)

13. The person’s name is your password

14. The person’s pic is your background/screen saver

15. They have the spare key to your car

16. they have the spare key to your apartment, and DON’T have to call before they come

17. you have outright or underhandedly ended at least two friendships because he/she didn’t approve

18. you spend 80% of your time with your friends asking them to repeat what they said because you were either texting your “boo” or whispering sweet nothings into his/her ear

19. you send the person texts when they are in the same room

20. there are at least three folders on your computer dedicated to pictures of the person/you together

21. you’ve started using their favourite phrases in conversation

22. you’ve abandoned all you’re other fragrances and only wear his/her favourite

23. you have cut/grown out your hair because he/she said it would be cute

24. there are spare pairs of underwear, socks, a toothbrush, and deodorant being stored at your place

25. you spent your rent money planning a surprise birthday/anniversary party

26. you really believe “its the thought that counts”

27. many of your conversations with friends start with you saying “long time no see”

28. your friends answer the phone with: “is either yu sick or yu get time off fi good behaviour”

29. you have a “merged” schedule in your diaries

30. your bedroom is painted in his/her favourite colour

31. you’ve taken up cooking so you can make his/her favourite meals

32. you’ve started staying home (if you used to go out) or you’ve taken up clubbing as your main aerobic exercise (if you used to be a couch warmer)

33. you’ve forgotten ur own cell number but can dial his/hers from a coma

34. you’ve abandoned government names in favour of baby, honey and schnookums

35. you have an entire mixed CD of “our songs”

36. People aren’t allowed to adjust the passenger seat in your car because it’s his/her settings

37. you use the toilet with the door open

38. she applies facial masks, hair mayonniase and other unattractive beauty products in front of you and you are unbothered

39. he picks his razor bumps in front of you and you are unphased.

40. you buy credit for TWO

41. you’re in a VIP

42. you have worn her pink slippers with the flower on it down the road to the gas station etc

43. you have worn his size 14 slippers to pick up some take out food

44. farting in bed is considered a fun diversion before having sex

45. you love “slimmaz” and “dainty body” people and yet he/she has gained 20 pounds and all you think is “hmmmm more to love”

46. you spend your meetings looking at pics of him/her on your phone/laptop

47. you sleep with a photo of him/her beside the bed or worse under the pillow

48. you kiss the photo goodnight

49. you have her favourite teddy bear on your bed because she says he’ll keep you safe

50. your barber knows her by name and on sight

51. your hairdresser knows him by name and on sight

52. when people can’t find you they call him/her to find out where you are (Phoenixx)

53. when you go out, you don’t even wine and grind anymore, you just wait for the appropriate time to go home and cuddle.

54. you have a weekly date to comb out/braid his hair

55. you have a weekly date to pick the razor bumps on the back of her leg

56. you kiss in the mornings before brushing your teeth

57. you share a toothbrush because something happened to happened to his/hers THREE MONTHS AGO

58. your dog cat runs to him/her BEFORE running to you when you come home

59. you can’t blaze fyah on certain songs anymore because of your bedroom activity

60. you try to convince your friends that IT’s not actually that bad, and they should come over to the intelligent side of sex, the side with “brains”

61. you actually do think she’s sexy in a bleached out T shirt and jeans and some dutty slippers

62. you actually do find him attractive after a basketball game and a bus from half way tree

63. you’ve started helping with house work, at HER house

64. you’ve gone on and on about him/her so much that your younger sibling has brought home a mate that looks eerily like your partner

65. you have assigned sides on both your beds

66. you believe her when she says she’s a virgin

67. you believe him when he says he never had sex with that girl

68. you stop introducing her as your “cousin” or your ‘sistren’

69. you stop introducing him as your co-worker/bredrin/ school mate “this guy i’m kind of talking to”

70. when you refer to her with your friends you use her real name and not “catty” “B” “ting”

71. if your friends call and you are with her, you say i am with so and so and not “me de pon a ends right now” or “mi a deal wid a ting iyah”

72. your tone of voice changes when you realises its him/her calling

73. you blow kisses and send i loves you over the phone even in crowds or at dinner with your family or in the bar with your friends

74. everyphone call involves 10 minutes of hanging up…you hang you…okay same time..1 2 3…see i know u weren’t gonna hang up. *giggle giggle* *blush blush*

75. you join clubs just because he/she is doing them

76. you take courses just because he/she is doing them

77. you learned a foreign language because he/she no speaka no english move to another parish/state/country to be with him/her

79. you will pay that $100 US change fee to push that ticket back by one day so you can have one more night together

80. you spend 1 hour and hundreds of dollars worth of credit on a cell call (not in a VIP) because he/she is having a bad day and wanted to hear your voice

81. phone calls last until both of you run out of credit as a rule.

82. you got an additional phone so you both can be on the same network and in a calling plan

83. after the phone call ends you find yourself looking at the person’s name in your call log and smiling and sighing and perhaps even stroking the screen

84. you can’t take calls from each other on public anymore because you get so excited you start screaming and people stare

85. when you do take their calls you find yourself wandering away from the crowd to stand under some random tree, make hearts in the dirt with the toe of your shoe and caress whatever tree trunk/chain link fence etc is handy

86. when you are together people keep asking you if you’ve done something to your hair or if you’re working out because yu look different like yu a glow


2 Replies to “how to know if you’re sprung”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s