lies people tell (1)

Yu know say a nuff lie we a live wid pon a daily basis? And we a tell lie too? Like simple tings weh we nuh even a pay attention to. Lies enuh?

 

See di first set yah.

1) DWL <—and still a type? A mussi zombie have yu phone now caw seeit deh yu dead 5 time from we start chat and yet….
Or maybe a android yu have, ascording to di ad dem deh phone deh nuh even need human fi survive.

2)Love yu like cook food <—and a lone bread and cheese yu feed pon? When last pot go pon fire weh yu live? Furthermore….di pot dem nuh permanently in place a ketch water weh a leak through yu roof? So wah y’a try say is yu nuh really love me at all…oh. Now me hear yu

3)LMAO <—wah yu plan fi shit through? Shoulda think this through before yu decide fi do da one ya

4) I only have eyes for you <–y’a horse? A you name seabiscuit? Dem put on blinders pon yu? Me nuh sure. If y’a walk a road yu nuh muss see odda people? Wus like how yu like gyal wid big batty and me have concave back. Better yu tell me say yu glimpse dem but yu nah stare. Caw yu mus at least look. <—now, if yu ever deh wid me yu know say dis nuh really apply to me. If me and you deh and yu tell me say yu see odda people a lone scarred retina and dem summn deh inna yu future caw me a go craab out yu yeye dem. Me nah hide and talk.

5) Lol <—right now dis a di biggest internet/text/messenger lie a go roun. Worse dan di one weh if yu forward di message di phone company a go gi di baby di money fi save dem from di disease. Nobody is as easily amused as we claim to be in text.
Good morning- ℓσℓ.
Just leaving home- ℓσℓ.
Oh no, car lick down me dog – ℓσℓ
Unnu a laugh track?
Whaapen to ‘yes’, and ‘ok’, and ‘fi real’, and ‘so how did that happen’ and on special occasion ‘rass!’
Dem have at least 20 emoticon yu can use
But no
The incessant lol. Worse LOL. Shout dem a shout and laugh now enuh. Dem a L dem AO. Yu tink smaddy coulda laugh as much as dem lol and still have job? Boss nuh fire or commit dem long time? Long time. Me feel we need lli. Yes laughs loudly inside. Dat soun more honest to me

6) You’re perfect.
A me name yahweh? It nice fi hear enuh but part a yu always a wonder. Caw yu know say yu miserable. Sometimes yu green. Yu hog di sheets and y’a hot head. Yu nuh like wake up early And nuh bodda mek we talk bout how yu nuh even like pickney and old people. Better dem say you’re perfect for me. But I guess dat tek longer fi say and di qualification dilute di sentiment, so gallang.

Awrite. Me haffi come outta di bathroom and go do me work and stop hide and blog now
If yu have anymore lies please holla at me and me will add dem to di next edition because is fibbers all around <—fibbers enuh, when last yu hear dem word deh? Talk up to me vocabulary. Rehhhhhh.

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2 Replies to “lies people tell (1)”

  1. I use lal (laugh a little) – my frens get it but ofcourse when mi use it pon di occasional bbm convos ppl a act weird and all a try correct mi . but fi real on fb or twitter I just work wid di lol cause I cant bother wid the whole heap splainin

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