if a slinky and a porn star had a baby- neon hitch f u betta official video jus drop

so now

pon top a video camera, a nex ooman, whip, chain, handcuff, whipped cream (separate from di whip), fan fi heng off pon, gloves fi heng on pon di fan, ice cube, toothpase, chloraseptic (if yu doan know yu better ask somebody), rope, strawberry and 3 different kinda syrup, 5 inch stilettos, and 27 years worth a yoga so me can ben up like W

me mus carry car oil come inna di bedroom fi please me smaddy?

where does this list end?

me mus wait til dem reach wrench and bird beak pliers

caw me realise a mechanic we a go

jack? lug tool? transmission fluid? wiper wash? where?!

and moreover

how is it possible dat nuh matter how she ben up harself

she still look good?

yu know seh yu cyaan look good from every angle?

from shakira dweet me a pree enuh

da car oil sittn yah a gwaan enuh

it a tun inna a real ting enuh

victoria’s secret and intimate occasions soon buss dem line

and me nuh know wedda a havoline or di brand weh dem sell down a jampet but me nuh sure me trus no oil so close to  me vag person

jesus savior pilot me

once again

if dis is what is outta road as my competition

following Lent i will be back on di sweets but i will be dropping off sex fi life

wah me fi do wid dis?

me cyaan do nuttn gainst dis

she is half serpent half riva mumma

she is clearly di end result of a slinky and a porn star having one fabulous night and an unplanned pregnancy

me cyaan compete wid dat

i quit

PS…..me like da song ‘ere

from it buss

real scallawa talk dese

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3 responses

  1. *piss up miself* U gurl, y must u do this to people? Mi lub it hunnie, mi love it!!! Mi nuh have nuh gasoline, but mi a wonder if engine oil woulda be a good substitute…All in all, mi believe har, mi seriously think a truth she a talk inna dis song.

  2. She recycled Beyonce’s dance moves and rolled around in engine oil. If she was that good she wouldn’t have to do all that. It’d be like BAM there it is now say thank you and go sleep. LOL

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