dear next woman on the mega bus

How do I put this….
Yu tink yu deh a yu yard?
Yu have kitchen roun a di back a di bus wid pot weh waan scrub and junjo a grow pon bread?
No? Well if so we can safely conclude seh yu nuh deh a yu yard
So why yu systematically a undress yusself inna di people dem bus like yu inna yu drawin room?
Eeh?
Me realise say yu colonise di two seat dem and sekkle een caw nuhbaddy nuh fi siddung side a yu
Me nah bad mout yu
We all do it
But nex ting me know shoes pop off and yu well and recline like yu inna yu drawin room wid foot cock up pon chair
well prawl off
And thankfully yu have on jeans else di man inna di nex chair woulda look right up inna yu hopes dreams and aspirations
Dat did bad and nuh so bad

But now…YU TEK OFF DI SOCKS!!!
And lekka tell yu summn, yu hoof dem nuh have up front appearance
And mek one whiff a cheese ever pass me nose in yah!
Unnu see me dyin trial
A grind up har crusty foot dem inna di people dem chair enuh
Foot bottom sound like sand paper
Unnu undastan now why yu nuh fi travel inna short clothes?
Yu nuh know who was doin what pon di very seat weh yu siddung pon
Watchya!?
She a rearrange harself
Wah movie star marilyn monroe pose she a gi we
Yes fren
A your world
Scrub off di foot yah
Mek it shine
And read yu book
Caw yu life sawt out
Steups
Look here
Call me wah yu waan call me but public space is public space please treat it as such
This is a megabus chair and not your settee weh yu buy from courts!
Steups